So I guess I WAS completely frozen in the end. Maybe not because of the freezing weather... I just read my last post and thought to myself that, in those almost two months since I didn't give a sign of life, the situation didn't change much. I continued to struggle and to ask myself if I made the right decision. This really was a big change for me and it isn't over yet. What frightens me is that on the one side I appreciate the security and the stability of the job but on the other side I am overwhelmed by the desire to do something big and crazy. Like moving (again!) far away. Or creating my own company. Both of the ideas sound tempting and frightening at the same time. It's almost like a life decade thing. In my twenties I did the usual: studying, marrying and having kids. In mu thirties I started a new life and a new career in Germany. In my forties, I came to Canada and started another, completely new life and career. Well, okay, I didn't change my husband nor my kids, but everything else was new.
As I was taking a walk last week near my work place, I was passing by a construction site of the "Bonhomme Carnaval" Ice Palace. It struck me that I was given the opportunity to build my life like the ice palace. I had to work hard and in difficult circumstances in order to build something strong and beautiful for my family. But unfortunately it couldn't last, so I had to do it all over again.
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